Wednesday, 27 November 2013

Scrooge.

Scrooge was dismayed that the spirits had appeared for a second year. Fortunately they had the wrong address. So with glad farewells and a merry Christmas all round they were pointed in the direction of Bob Cratchit`s house by Scrooge, who hoped that  the spirits would teach the uppity bastard his proper place in society.

Tuesday, 29 October 2013

Health and Safety.

After a number of road accidents involving animals, measures were taken to prevent further incidents,  Unfortunately a number of Species were hunted to exrinction in the following months.

N.b. Apologies to Landseer.

Wednesday, 12 June 2013

3D Printing

The Governor started to regret dragging the Prison workshop into the 21st Century.

Thursday, 6 June 2013

Google Glass

Due to an unfortunate interaction between the eyepiece and his Neural Implant, Fred`s consciousness now formed a significant part of his Dropbox account.

Wednesday, 5 June 2013

Big Data

Now that the behaviour of any individual on the planet could be predicted, the Intelligence Chief worried about the consequences of suddenly switching to Hot chocolate after Thirty years of choosing Coffee in the afternoon.

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

Exoplanet

Although the Ape like creatures were amusing and mischievious, they were self desructive and so the Scout concluded that they must never be allowed to spread into the Galaxy.

Tuesday, 21 May 2013

Global Warming

Suddenly the Professor realised that a significant amount of Co2 contributing to Climate Change had been produced by all the Supercomputers working on the problem.

Friday, 17 May 2013

Internet of things.

Old Jake began to believe that his fridge had come to the conclusion that he had shot JFK....and was about to rat him out to the Feds.

Wednesday, 15 May 2013

Misdirection.

Usually at this time of the evening the M6 was gridlocked. But tonight Google Earth Traffic showed it moving along quite freely.

Friday, 10 May 2013

Bitcoin

Frank was mildly displeased to find that the electricity bill for the mining rig was ten times the amount it produced in coins.

Thursday, 9 May 2013

The Robots are here.

The Human crew of Mars One knew from the start that this was a one way trip, but why had  nobody back on Earth bothered to tell the Robonauts?

Wednesday, 8 May 2013

A Quotation (well sort of.)

          The White Heat of Technological revolution.*

* Harold Wilson.

Monday, 13 August 2012

Today I`m thinking about..

Slip,Slap,Slop.

Unfortunately I find that the most effective Sun block is the British weather.

Saturday, 11 August 2012

Today I`m thinking about..

Faith, Hope and Charity.

Faith.  Be careful it can stick to you like a Band Aid covered in Superglue, if affected try not to get it in your eyes.

Hope.  The last refuge of the unlucky.

Charity.  I just wish thar the givers were a bit more humble and the receivers a bit more patronising.

Friday, 27 July 2012

Today I`m thinking about..

The Vegetable Plot.

Ok you might call them weeds, but I call them "wild companion plants".